Talking To Myself Some More

Here, I continue my fictionalized conversation with myself about the world of television.

Eric: Hey, Eric. How are things going?
Eric: Not the best, a bird flew into my face Fabio-style today. I have this big bruise on the side of my face and now it hurts to floss.

Eric: The good-looking people never get the breaks, do they?
Eric: No, they really don't.

Eric: Anyways, I was wondering if you had any thoughts on the world of commercials.
Eric: My commercial watching has been down since I got a TiVo, but I can comment historically. I always thought one of the most underrated ads of all time was this Volkswagen ad, which is artistically shot, perfectly timed, and is just plain funny.


My #2 most underrated ad is this Nike "Musical Chairs" interpretation, which works visually far better than I would have imagined had I seen it on paper. I don't know many people who have seen this ad - I wonder if it would have captured the public imagination more with some star power.


Finally, I think that the "Yo Quiero Taco Bell" was one of the most overrated and inexplicably popular ads of all time. I only thought it was marginally funny at the time, and couldn't believe that an entire campaign would be built around it. It would grow to be as tiresome as the "Whassssssup?!?" ads, but at least there, I felt that the original ad was inspired and unique. The Taco Bell ad seems to only be funny if you inherently think Spanish is funny. Like whoever enjoyed "Nacho Libre".


Eric: You don't seem to be all that discriminating with what you watch on TV, much like myself. What is the worst show you've ever seen?
Eric: This is a hard question to answer, because I've only seen the worst shows ever like one time, or in many cases only for 15 or 20 minutes. Oftentimes, a show isn't as preposterously bad as it first appears, just regular-bad. That being said, I have some reasonable guesses at 4 candidates for the "Worst Ever" title. They are all, of course, reality shows and you've likely never heard of any of them (the worst scripted shows is another question entirely, which we can take up in the comments if anyone is interested in my take).

Are You Hot? The Search for America's Sexiest People - I can barely even describe this show without laughing. Like hotornot.com meets American Idol. The judging panel (including Lorenzo Lamas) scored you on "face", "body", and "sex appeal". Watch this video, and listen closely as the announcer asks this girl for her "Declaration of Hotness".




Britney and Kevin: Chaotic - I've never seen this show, but people who have are confident that it is the worst thing ever put on television. The "show" was cobbled together almost solely from home video footage shot by Mr. Federline and Ms. Spears themselves, so...yeah. That's gotta be a winner.

Looking For Love: Bachelorettes in Alaska - A bunch of desperate women get sent to glaciers in Alaska to compete in various games (like catching giant fish thrown at them - seriously) to get chances to meet random guys. I've seen the least of this show - only about 10 minutes. It was a sadly memorable 10 minutes.

Mr. Personality - This was a Bachelorette-type dating show. Hosted by MONICA LEWINSKY. Let that sink in for a second. The premise was that a woman would date a bunch of guys, all of whom were wearing masks. So, knowing them only by personality, who would she pick? The show took a turn to crazytown when the men alleged that the guy in the green mask was unfairly using his powers of hypnosis (seriously) to control the mind of the woman. Sadly there are no YouTube clips of this. I really wish you could see this.

Eric: It's been fun talking to you again. We should discuss movies next time.
Eric: Yes, let's! I'm like, super-duper psyched!