I saw the preview for "Good Luck, Chuck", and now I'm terribly afraid that I'm going to watch this movie. (Quick summary: Dane Cook somehow is a good luck charm: if women sleep with him, they will get married shortly thereafter to someone they love. Cook, on his own, falls in love with Jessica Alba, but can't sleep with her because then she'll fall in love with someone else and get married. So he has to balance his blossoming love with being unable to have sex, and hilarity ensues. He also has this fat "funnyman" friend, a role that was definitely written for Horatio Sanz - pretty sad that Horatio can't even land roles specifically written for him.) Watching this movie would be foolish for a lot of reasons, first and foremost that I would be supporting the career of Dane Cook, whose inexplicable popularity probably signals the impending downfall of the United States and potentially the entire universe.I assume it's obvious why I'm afraid I'll watch this, but I'll say it anyways - Jessica Alba looks absurdly hot. That's not a good enough reason to watch it, but if anyone could convince me to make a bad movie decision, it's Jessica Alba. History has proven that I am prone to such mistakes (albeit rentals, not in theaters, thankfully) such as 2000's "Bedazzled", which featured Elizabeth Hurley while still at her peak, but also had the abysmally untalented and unappealing Brendan Fraser, whose continued existance as a mainstream actor shocks me to the core.
Or "Valentine", starring Denise Richards and Katherine Heigl, lending their questionable dramatic talents to one of the stupidest scripts anyone ever greenlighted. I think I would have watched anything Denise Richards was in back then, so it's probably for the best that she's such a poor actress that she barely managed to be in any non-straight-to-DVD movies. I think one of the worst movies in this vein was "The Rich Man's Wife", an ill-fated 1996 movie that tested whether Halle Berry could singlehandedly carry a movie that would be bad even if it were made for Lifetime. I couldn't find the trailer, but someone, for reasons unknown, decided to post this clip on YouTube. Watch the clip - even more confusing than someone posting this is that 28 people added it to their favorites.I won't watch "Good Luck, Chuck" in theaters, because 1) that's foolish and 2) no one would watch with me anyways, but I can already sense myself breaking down and renting it in January 2008. That will, in an indirect way, put more money in Dane Cook's pocket. It will be a sad day indeed.
11 comments:
when i was in high school i watched wing commander because my friends and i thought freddy prinze jr. was hot.
it was a crappy movie, and he is not hot.
i was a stupid child.
Fear not, I know a guy who saw Wing Commander because he thought it would be awesome, and afterwards, still felt it was kind of awesome.
rob?
Yeah, Rob
Dude, you just wasted 30 seconds of my life.
unrelated to above comment:
I was going to sleep, but then I saw a picture of Jessica Alba.
I loved Denise Richards. Her absolute peak was in that James Bond movie as a nuclear physicist...but it also ruined her for me. Too bad.
Jessica Alba though...yes, I will probably watch this as well. Haha. I wish KK (Kristen Kreuk) would make a movie too. With Jessica.
Also, I am way too excited to watch these trailers after work...
Denise Richards is perhaps the worst actress I've ever seen. Scratch perhaps. She IS the worst. For a while I thought her acting was just her interpretation of realism, and maybe that was how she acted in real life, but then I saw her on The Dog Whisperer, that show where some guy, I think he's Hispanic though it doesn't matter, trains other people's dogs. And, surprise surprise, Denise was having trouble with her pugs. What really shocked me was how she seemed so natural when they talked to her on camera. And this made me hate her acting even more. As Dr. Christmas (seriously, they didn't even try to get creative with her name) in James Bond, she was so bad I thought she was the comedic relief. If Horatio Sanz and Jimmy Fallon were in the movie, laughing while they spoke their own lines, they couldn't have made it worse.
Additionally, I'd like to speak up for Bedazzled, which I personally liked. While I will agree that Brendan Frasier is nearly the male equivalent of Denise Richards, he did show some limited talent in Crash. And Ms. Hurley more than made up for his lack of charisma as the devil herself. Plus most of Frasier's roles have been physically comedic, a style which is somewhat incompatible with serious professional acting.
hahaha, brendan "frasier"
sorry to nitpick, but he is my nemesis, so i tend to notice things like that. i hate that guy. although he did do well in encino man by knowing his place and letting the supremely talented pauly shore outshine him in scene after scene.
yeah, my bad. meant fraser.
Denise Richards, for all her horrible acting, brings one thing to the table. She's hot. Otherworldly hot. Jimmy Fallon brings absolutely nothing to anything he's in. I dare you to watch him and Queen Latifah in "Taxi".
As for Brendan Fraser, I would contend that his face is somewhat incompatible for serious professional acting. Some people just don't have a face that works for serious movies, and I think Fraser has this problem. Not as much as say, Chris Kattan, but still a bad fit.
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